|Posted by Rujizzle on April 3, 2012 at 1:35 PM|
Part 1: The Mind-Set of a man
Chapter 1: What Drives Men
In this chapter, Harvey talks about the drive of men and they are: "his title (who he is), how he gets that title (what he does), and the reward he gets for the effort (how much he makes). These three things make up the basic DNA of manhood..." (Page 11). He goes on to explain further about what these three things mean to men and without these accomplishments, he would never be able to fully focus on his partner and/or have intentions for marriage.
I do understand where he's coming from with this analogy, but I also know that not every man's mentality is built this way. For instance, society always says that every girls dreams for her wedding day but in reality it isn't every girl at all. Yes, there are women that long for marriage and see it as one of the greatest achievements in life, but there are also others that see having a stable and prosperous career or community outreach in many forms as a peak in their lives. Therefore, I believe that Harvey should have used words such as "some men" or "certain men." Also, I believe that one's place of origin is very vital in addressing this logic because he explains that these are the things instilled in every little boys head. When I was growing up the advice that was given to the boy/men family members was the same given to the girls/women as well.
From the tone and message of the book, I can imply that the audience that Harvey is trying to cater to is Black American women with regards to Black American men. I interact with various Black American boys/men, and some will say that Harvey's logic is incorrect because they have been successful in taking care of their careers and love relationships. In my opinion, I feel that Harvey's logic is not so subtly saying that men are obligated to take care of their women, and that is why they must attain the things in order to be fully committed in any type of relationship.
Therefore, I think it all comes down to who the individual is, their upbringing, and personal goals in life.
Categories: IMO Reviews